What I’m Doing At 39 To Avoid Regret At 79
In 160 days I turn 40 years old, but who’s counting? I had no idea what an impact that number would have on me this year. It’s inspired a lot of brave, bold actions that have really surprised me (a few of which I’m not quite ready to talk about).
This year so far I’ve:
🤓 I’ve decided to go back to school to get my Master’s degree.
❌ I quit one of my jobs, in turn sacrificing thousands of dollars a month to focus on my writing and the development of my coaching business.
📍My husband and I have finally started taking steps to invest in property for a second home.
😴 I’ve recently built out my schedule for 2024 to incorporate a 40 day sabbatical.
All of these things feel radical – and necessary. This year also got me thinking far past the 40-year mark and what I’m doing now to set myself up for success years and years from now. So, I made a list, obviously.
Here are 11 life-changing practices I’m doing at 39 to avoid regret when I’m 79:
- Looking people in the eye and taking the time to be fully present with whoever I’m with – be that Winston, my nieces, a client – so by 79 I am FILLED UP with incredible experiences I was 100% present for.
- Making shitty art 📝 – and having fun doing it.
- Whether 11, 39 or 79, I know I am is an explorer 🗺️ so I’m committed to experiencing new places and exposing myself to culture, diversity, beauty and history. Ah! Imagine all the memories and pictures I’ll have accumulated by 79!
- Saving bits of money 💰 so I can be independent for as long as possible and be cared for by quality people in a quality facility / home surrounded by friends and family when I’m 79.
- Moving my body daily and doing my stupid little stretches so I have mobility, flexibility and muscle strength 💪 for as long as humanly possible. 79-year-old me will be movin’ and a-groovin’ 🤸
- Prioritizing joy DAILY 🤩 – because 79-year-old Ashley wants to look back on a life of fun, joy, fond memories and connection!
- Telling people what I love about them and how incredible I think they are 😍 so they never have to doubt how I feel about them.
- Asking people to meet me at my level ⬆️ rather than stooping to someone else’s ⬇️ – a place I know I don’t belong and 79-year-old Ashley would be so annoyed if I lowered my standards.
- Speaking of standards…Never settling for less than what I know I’m worth.
- Saying “no” unapologetically 🙅♀️ to the things that don’t align with my values, and making decisions that align with my authenticity. I’ve sacrificed too much of my time and health putting others before my own health and happiness. 79-year-old Ashley says no more!
- Being proud of myself every day 👏 – no matter what I get done or accomplish. 79-year-old Ash will be rolling her eyes if I spend one more second poo-pooing how amazing I am!
What is on your list, amazing human? What are you doing now, to avoid regret when you’re older? As they say, better now than never.
Your Turn…
What are you doing now, to avoid regret when you’re older?
Feel welcome to share your responses in the comments below. We would love to read your lists!
Guest Author: Ashley Looker is an Empowerment & Journal Coach who teaches ambitious, over-achieving humans how to slow down and detach their productivity from their worth. She is passionate about using her 20+ year experience and love for journaling as the tool for supporting her clients who want to stop wearing ’busy’ as a badge of honor and start living a more joyful, purpose-driven life. She lives in the cozy PNW with her husband and 5 lb. Yorkipoo, Winston. You can learn more about Ashley’s work here >>
Ashley, as someone who is about to turn 79 and who has lived my life in many of the ways you have set out to live yours, my message to you is: “Keep going!” I promise you that what you’ve committed to will open worlds you never knew were possible.
When Maya Angelou was 82, I heard her say it was the best time of her life. As I’ve aged, I feel the same way. It will only get better and especially if you make an effort to live in the moment and greet each person with a smile.
Congrats on your wisdom!
Warmly,
Merle R. Saferstein
Hi Merle, thanks for your beautiful comment to Ashley and for the inspiration that things get better and better, or can, as we age. Thanks for being an example of thriving at near 79. Love, Lynda
Wow, Merle! Thank you so much for sharing your insights! 🙏 This inspires me so, so much! And as Lynda has said, thank you so much for being the incredible example – it only gets better!
Dear Ashley,
I am another 79er and you can be my mentor any time!
Looking back and forward we come to many of the
same conclusions: grow, give, love and stay flexible in mind, body and spirit.
Thank you for your contribution and thank you to Lynda for expanding all of our visions.
With love,
Gail Braverman
Gail! It’s so lovely to be connected with you and to hear your insights about staying flexible in all areas – SO TRUE. I am learning that as we speak 🩷
This is excellent advice for all ages, for all people. Too many shed their ideals in order to succeed, when the truth is that succeeding lies in becoming full of child-like wonder and joy, infused with the possibilities of possibilities. Boundaries are actually gates that open into wondrous pastures. Stretching, of both body and mind elevates one’s perspective and inspires new pathways. Leading with the heart is the “corrective lens” which repudiates cynicism and permits the augmentation of contentment and peace. Peace, Love, Joy, Caring, Wonder, Energy Zest- these are precious gifts to take along the journey of Life. Namaste .
Ah, this is so lovely, R. Sriracha Srirachakat Singh Mehta! I, too, believe in the power of joy and child-like wonder. We live in such an incredible world! Thank you so much for sharing your insights 🙏